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Mean people?? or Mean culture?

Hong Kong, Taiwanese and Mainland China entertainments goes here.
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ali_sen
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Mean people?? or Mean culture?

Post by ali_sen » Apr 13th, '07, 19:16

Wow... Watching shows like Tokyo Juliet... I mean, I know that dramas are waaaaaaaay exaggerated, but... why are so many people so MEAN in these dramas? It seems like its always 80% bullies!

I lived in Korea for a good while, and yes they were mean, but I assumed it was because I was a foreigner... once I dyed my hair black (I am a natural blond) I was picked on a lot less because I blended in more. It was scary living in such a different culture. I had strangers, men I never met, come over to me in public and touch my butt or even my chest!! I had students try to touch me too, and the principal of the school said that it was okay because I was a foreigner and basically "on display" for them. I thought maybe I was just in a bad school...

But even though I love these dramas, I see so much mean-ness. Is it really like that? Is the majority of people there that mean? Its awful to be a foreigner over there, I think... I was treated so badly. I miss the food and travel, but I don't miss the way the people treated me.

Anyone have thoughts on these things?

Puppet Princess
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Post by Puppet Princess » Apr 13th, '07, 21:12

Well, I'm not sure about how they treat their own countrymen but as far as foreigners go, I wouldn't expect them to like you or be nice. Though that does depend on the country you are talking about. The major countries like Japan, China, and Korean are known to be very discriminative and into isolating themselves.

But then their are countries such as Thailand that love you if you're a foreigner, at least that's my experience. I never got molested or attacked in Thailand. Exact opposite actually. I was fawned over.

I think the closest think I've ever experienced to harassment was once in Bali I had some guy on the street randomly propose to me (I was 10 at the time so it scared me).

I've never been to the major Asian counters though so I'm not sure how they would treat me there, but I wouldn't be surprised if they were mean.

fuddleduddle
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Post by fuddleduddle » Apr 13th, '07, 22:44

depends where you're at in a country. well developed cities don't have that kind of problem, or places where tourism is prevalent. so places like hong kong, tokyo, thailand are obvious exceptions. if you decide to venture to the extreme countrysides say a rice field village... maybe you'll get some odd looks.

ali_sen
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Post by ali_sen » Apr 13th, '07, 23:26

Gosh...

I was in a major city... I was in Seoul, Korea. An upscale, richer-class part. In the time I was there, the impression I got was that the men were mostly perverts and the women were so fake. It was really hard to make friends, I think it was the loneliest time of my life. Is America more welcoming because its such a mixing pot of cultures? I tried so hard to be polite in Korea. I learned their language, studied every day, bowed all the time when I was supposed to, dressed very conservative, and was as polite as I could. And it was a lot of the meanest people ever. Its just sad, because I really like to travel and experience other cultures. I've been to 6 other countries, and from my experience, the people in Korea were definitely mean. I've always wanted to go to Taiwan or Japan and see so many places, but I think I'd be afraid to go, just because they'd be mean to me as a foreigner. Its pretty sad, that just being from another country makes people treat you badly. When Koreans visit the US at my work place, they always comment how wonderful their welcome is, and how happy they are that I can greet them and answer their questions in their own language. It makes me so sad that I can't say the same about them.

I just hate mean-ness! When people are mean i just want to yell GROW UP AND BE NICE!!! Okay, I feel better now having said that. :-P

Sorry for being so depressing >_< The country had a lot of nice places, and I did make friends with an old lady that I went walking with every morning for exercise. I think that she was in better shape than I was, despite her gray hair. :-P heehee.

Btw, I can probably help translating Korean dramas, but I admit to being out of practice. Gotta drag out the dictionary and dust it off, maybe? :)

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spacecommand
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Post by spacecommand » Apr 13th, '07, 23:46

why are so many people so MEAN in these dramas? It seems like its always 80% bullies!
Because it makes for good entertainment of course.

When you watch action movies the police and bad guys are always shooting people up and blowing up parts of the town, because it makes for good entertainment. In real life that stuff doesn't happen (much at least).

My personal opinion is its the person, rather than than the group. Though people with like minds seem to stay within the same group so it seems like everyone is against you.
was in a major city... I was in Seoul, Korea. An upscale, richer-class part. In the time I was there, the impression I got was that the men were mostly perverts and the women were so fake.
Lets see, upscale beverly hills california, new york city 5th avenue, Tokyo Ginza, I'm pretty sure many cities with upscale rich class would be very similar type of people no matter what country you were in.
When Koreans visit the US at my work place, they always comment how wonderful their welcome is, and how happy they are that I can greet them and answer their questions in their own language
Funny because thats how I hear travelers from here in the US say when they visit other countries, how how they are nicer to them, than at home etc. Its reciprical.

I know someone who complained that the United States was a bunch of racists because they often had bad things said to them by some people when they visited.

I do not think its a cultural thing, I think its a generational thing, I think its a personal thing.
Its hard to categorize people based on some bad experiences. Ignorance is a major factor into it too. All depends on the person you run into. I know someone who's living in Korea right now and loves it, says everyone is nice and friendly (they are woking as an English teacher there 2 years now).

As for Japan, many people say the people are nice, then I know many people who complain about some of the ignorance of people they run into. Its all about the person in my opinion. When I was there, generally everyone I ran into was nice and polite, good friends. If someone is ignorant or ignores you, I don't give them a second thought.

Also note I don't think this topic really belongs in the Chinese Culture & Entertainment forum. Unless are you asking are Chinese people generally mean? But I don't see that in the question.

ali_sen
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Post by ali_sen » Apr 14th, '07, 01:37

Hah, originally I posted because in all the dramas, it seems like so many people in the Chinese dramas are so mean!!

One thing I learned in Korea is that some people [note that i say some... not a generalization] are really good at pretending. They'd pretend to like the new teachers, the foreigners. But then they'd go and talk about them behind their back. I learned Korean quickly, and I lost count of the times that Koreans would pretend to like me, and then talk badly about me in Korean right in front of me. There was no trying to really get to know me- I was a foreigner and they didn't like us because we got paid more and had more benefits, even though I willingly worked much much longer hours than my contract stated. I worked 7 days a week! (I'm getting off topic here) It's just that, I met a lot of people in Korea. I traveled all over. I have traveled several cultures, and the fakest, meanest one was Korea. And it was just brought back to memory by a lot of the drama. It's not just in TV shows, sadly. A lot of those stupid things happen in real life by mean girls and perverted guys.

I am glad to hear that everyone's experience is not that same, and glad that the perosn you know in Korea has a better experience than mine. I'm glad that she doesn't have to work 7 days a week, 8 am to 11 pm. Or that the security man thinks he can assault her because she's foreign. I would definitely like to think that their culture has a lot more positive things, and that I just somehow managed to get stuck in the worst of it. But... since it was pointed out that this is a bit off topic for this forum thread, I'll stop going on about my experience.

And i will add that I don't find mean girls in dramas 'entertaining' but rather, dull and repetitive. Its all too easy to create a mean antagonist. I like more creative characters than that, I guess! Or maybe its just too close to experience. Ah well!

^_^

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foxhana
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Post by foxhana » Apr 14th, '07, 17:43

actually i kinda agree on koreans being mean. there was this male celebrity(forgot his name) who endorses TheFaceShop, he came to singapore and singaporeans who spend dunno how much or something could go meet him and all he gave was a cool look and abit cold, but when he wnet to like taiwan or some other chiense place, he smile alot. dont know what's wrong with them.

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habukie
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Post by habukie » Apr 15th, '07, 03:17

i think it's strange that this thread begins by referencing a twdrama, but has quickly devolved into a comment on Korea and how they treat foreigners.... :blink

anyways, i have to say that first, as has already been mentioned, dramas are hugely exaggerated. in addition, tokyo juliet is based on a manga, which in of itself would suggest some unrealistic issues already.

i've never been to korea, but i can tell you what it is like in taiwan and somewhat in china. i spent quite a lot of time in taiwan, and while i'm not exactly a "foreigner" in looks, i knew a lot of other people who were there and stood out. all of their experiences to a man (or woman :-) ) were that they were treated very well (and sometimes even better) than those who may look the part. for instance, many were in high demand as english practice partners and even as girl/boyfriends. i knew someone who travelled by himself all over the island, and no matter where he went, he was helped out (his chinese wasn't that good). it went to the point of people giving him rides because he couldn't figure out the trains/buses. and in fact, many of people were able to find good jobs teaching english while those who might look asian couldn't. and i know several people who went to china (none of them able to speak a word of chinese) and were able to make their way around the countryside visiting different villages and places. when i asked them how they did it, they said that the people were all very helpful to them.

after reading some of the comments above, i feel that it's a shame that people treated you so poorly when you were trying to do your best. however, sometimes it just depends on the individuals. and maybe you were just around some petty, back-stabbing people who were so insecure that they had to mock the foreigners. sadly there are people like in the world...

Puppet Princess
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Post by Puppet Princess » Apr 16th, '07, 23:16

ali_sen wrote: One thing I learned in Korea is that some people [note that i say some... not a generalization] are really good at pretending. They'd pretend to like the new teachers, the foreigners. But then they'd go and talk about them behind their back. I learned Korean quickly, and I lost count of the times that Koreans would pretend to like me, and then talk badly about me in Korean right in front of me. There was no trying to really get to know me- I was a foreigner and they didn't like us because we got paid more and had more benefits, even though I willingly worked much much longer hours than my contract stated. I worked 7 days a week! (I'm getting off topic here) It's just that, I met a lot of people in Korea. I traveled all over. I have traveled several cultures, and the fakest, meanest one was Korea. And it was just brought back to memory by a lot of the drama. It's not just in TV shows, sadly. A lot of those stupid things happen in real life by mean girls and perverted guys.
You can find those types of people in every country, though. Perhaps the only reason you could tell the Korean ones apart was because they thought you couldn't understand them so they weren't as stealthy when talking about you.

No matter where you go you are going to meet some real jerks. The world is full of them. The up side is there are also a lot of great people in the world too. You just have to learn not to let the jerks upset you. They aren't worth worrying about. Worrying makes you old.

As long as no one is actually hurting you, it's healthier to just shrug off their rudeness. Though, if some creep tried to molest me on a train I'd probably disable his manly bits. Harassing a woman is just not cool. And it’s illegal in those countries as well.

AboutDrama
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Post by AboutDrama » Apr 17th, '07, 05:39

actually i kinda agree on koreans being mean. there was this male celebrity(forgot his name) who endorses TheFaceShop, he came to singapore and singaporeans who spend dunno how much or something could go meet him and all he gave was a cool look and abit cold, but when he wnet to like taiwan or some other chiense place, he smile alot. dont know what's wrong with them.

Talking about this issue... Maybe just maybe he discriminate people from south east Asia. In fact, some people from rich countries do discriminate people from south east Asia for some reasons... look down on them is one of the reason.

No matter what, I will not go to the extreme to idolize any actors/or actress regardless of which countries. Let them prove to me they are good hearted person first and NOT just a pretty face.


TO ali_sen: If you're not happy with Korea. Why don't you visit Japan. May be Japan is right for you.

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christaluvsdrama
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Post by christaluvsdrama » Apr 17th, '07, 09:11

My friends and I have talked a lot about this and its apparent that white ppl(caucasian so not to offend) in minority countries are the subjects of prejudice. The obvious reasons are(past history and politics). Its sad that the history of racism is forever repeating. What are some solutions to this, is what you're think about right? Ok diverse countries(US, UK and Canada ect.), although racism is always apparent, but ppl of different cultures cohabitating in the same place. What if the minority countries become intergrated? People would have to learn to co-exist with each other. Over time eliminating their preconceived notions about how the person is just because of their race.(hehe just my thought)


I live in California. I was born in LA and I've been almost everywhere in California and those who don't live here say we're very fake and snobs. I can agree and say that it's true to an extent. We're very diverse and populated here. ppl are welcoming to anyone and everyone no matter the race, but I have to say we are superficial attached with fake personalities if we don't like you. Either an expressed hate, outcasted or be fake as if we did like you. Being like this seems to be addictive here, its like you can assume your a really good person, but you get sucked into the superficialness of everything here and become really mean. I can admit, in high school I confused confidence with snobbery and conceededness.( I wasn't the type of person to talk badly others or being in clicks or anything) I realize after friends really being honest and telling me, that I gave others the impression that I was better than them and that they were inferior. Sometimes even now its hard to tell the difference between being confident and being conceeded, but I try my best not to let other feel like that. ooooo did I get of subject? hehe

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Post by itonobara » May 12th, '07, 07:34

The only place in asia I've been is tokyo, and I have to say I had the opposite experiance of most of you....

I went when I was 17, as a babysitter for a japanese american couple. I had 3 weeks notice, so I didn't speak a word of japanese. Literally. I learned how to say hello on the plane, but that's it. I have to say that after one week I thought that Japanse are some of the nicest people on the planet. Kids my age stoped and talked to me in stores; one boy at a 7/11 taught me "survival phrases" when he found out I couldn't speak any; everyone was kind and helpful. Basically, I realized that if I approuched people with a humble and friendly attitude, they were very friendly back.

I am now a Japanese major - i want to be a tranlator. And while I have met a some mean japanese/korean/ or twainese people, the majority are wonderful and kind. Most of my closest friends at school are korean and japanese.

So, I would say not to judge entire countries on bad experiances...I'm sorry some of you had bad experiances, but I'd give it another try. I wouldn't trade the friends I've made for anything ^^

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