met a girl at bookstore-she suggest we dinner, i said coffee

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joewong
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Joined: Dec 7th, '08, 04:46

met a girl at bookstore-she suggest we dinner, i said coffee

Post by joewong » Feb 3rd, '09, 05:47

Well pretty much i met this girl at the bookstore while she was looking at the book sale clearance section. i approached her and said hello and talked. pretty much a random approach-sheabout an average looking girl. i did at one point gave her my number and email addy out, and she without me asking wrote down her email addy out on a piece of papaer and gave it to me. we parted since i didn;t have much to talk anymore and said i had to go. see ya

well i emailed her a few days ago, but haven\t heard from her yet. i emailed her again and she replied back today.


i wrote at the top and she replied at the bottom. what i didn't like about her was her 4th line in the email shown below "|Will you buy me dinner". i did previously when i met her at the bookstore say "hey we can meet again and go for coffee" and she agreed. its just weird , but dinner and paying for it for a person i just met and now for 8 minutes. huh
do you think this girl is a freeloader and looking for a free meal or not. i do believe she is from overseas korean.
i'm not making a lot of money in my job,and saving up for things. so its not like a have money to blow either.
i was thinking about meeting again for ice cream, coffee, and check out some scenarious in vancouver area since she is from out of town. imean if i like her then dinner would be a thing.
i'm not even sure how long shes planning on staying in vancouver. i believe she said till sept

i just don't like the idea of her expecting a dinner from me. why dinner, isn;t coffee, ice cream and walk in the park or around good enough . and we don;lt even now each other at all, but for 8 minutes we chatted
what would u guys do in this sittuation-what would u do-

Hi Jenny
How are you doing today.we met at chapters a few days ago
when are you free? want to meet for coffee? i can show you around vancouver
theres this nice ice cream place near main st.

HER RESPONSE

Yes.. I remember you^^ How are you? I was a little bit busy because of my homework. I am free after school on thursday. Tomorrow and wednedsday i have an appointment.
If you are also free on thursday, we can meet together.^^ Will you buy me a dinner?^^
Let me know if you are available or not^^
Take care~ See you

cherillyn
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Location: Australia

Post by cherillyn » Feb 3rd, '09, 06:16

lol you guys are just so cute.

youre gonna sound heaps like a real tight-arse if you say no. just make up an excuse and let her know you have to work late that evening and perhaps coffee would be good if shes interested.

you dont have to buy her an exquisite meal - think of a place which you think you can afford and let her know youve got stuffs to take care of that Thursday evening so dinner/coffee nearby that place would be great. i suppose in that way you get to leave her a good impression :)

cut her some slack since shes new in town and probably looking for friends to chill out with - not everyone who asks to buy them a meal is a freeloader - take it easy and get to know her before you make judgments.

good luck and have fun :)

Puppet Princess
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Post by Puppet Princess » Feb 3rd, '09, 06:42

You are freaking out really quickly.

To me...
Coffee = casual short hang out.
Dinner = longer (an hour maybe more) and a real date.

In my eyes it seems more like a hint than freeloading.

nankasento
Posts: 127
Joined: Mar 5th, '08, 22:48

Post by nankasento » Feb 3rd, '09, 22:13

Come on dude, your a guy for crying out loud, select the choice you want to select and go with it, just think on your choice for a second or two to make sure you won't regret it after you've gone through with it.

Just remember, if you don't shoot you won't hit the mark either.

At least she's honoust and up front about it, give me food and I'll communicate with you and you can look at me while I eat, nothing is for free you know. ;D

From your previous posts, I'd say why not give it a shot, it's not like you have Asperger syndrome or something.

javinian
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Post by javinian » Feb 3rd, '09, 22:21

It sounds like you're playing a japanese adult video game... Go for diner dude, unless you're not interested in her.

That's the question, since you actually don't sound like you're much interested in that girl... are you?

Tass
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Joined: May 19th, '07, 13:21

Post by Tass » Feb 3rd, '09, 22:27

And ofc you invite her to dinner!

If you're a man, try to be a gentleman...
It's not like she's asking you to buy her an overpriced german sportscar.

For starters pizza is just fine.

epi
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Re: met a girl at bookstore-she suggest we dinner, i said co

Post by epi » Feb 3rd, '09, 23:01

joewong wrote: HER RESPONSE

Yes.. I remember you^^ How are you? I was a little bit busy because of my homework. I am free after school on thursday. Tomorrow and wednedsday i have an appointment.
If you are also free on thursday, we can meet together.^^ Will you buy me a dinner?^^
Let me know if you are available or not^^
Take care~ See you
is it just me or is anybody else thinking that she's just flirting with u? 8)
i mean sometimes i said that too "will you buy me dinner?" but it's more like a joke kind of thing ... meaning i'm not exactly forcing u to buy me dinner ...
heh ... but people are different so i don't know ...

i agree with Puppet Princess though, dinner is serious, while coffee is just like get to know each other thing ... so if u just knew her, i would definitely opt for coffee ... put it this way, if she pouts later on because u didn't take her to dinner then u'll know for sure that she's a freeloader :whistling:

but hey ... it's up to you ... but i do think that u're freaking urself out too quickly :lol

javinian
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Post by javinian » Feb 3rd, '09, 23:14

and don't forget the rubber!

lilswtangel
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Post by lilswtangel » Feb 3rd, '09, 23:19

javinian wrote:and don't forget the rubber!
what? gloves? :roll

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Gir
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Post by Gir » Feb 4th, '09, 02:12

javinian wrote:It sounds like you're playing a japanese adult video game... Go for diner dude, unless you're not interested in her.

That's the question, since you actually don't sound like you're much interested in that girl... are you?
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BlaqNumbr9
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Post by BlaqNumbr9 » Feb 4th, '09, 03:12

This is feeling a little Densha Otoko-ish to me. How about we start calling her Hermes? ;)

mimmi
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Post by mimmi » Feb 5th, '09, 10:21

Ahahha, I find this funny....@ lilswangel: yeah maybe latex gloves lol....@ gir,now that's a piece, superp! lol
@ joewong, she is flirting with u and also letting you know that she is interested in you...."buy me a dinner?" that's the message; she takes you as a gentleman and didn't want to insult you by offering to buy you the dinner to get to know you while your having dinner together, that's why she asked you to "buy her dinner", because she knows that a real gentleman won't let a lady go hungry, even though she's not hungry litterally; that's her message to you, doesn't mean she's not gonna help paying for the meal....just like Puppet Princess mentioned, dinner = one hr. or longer n a real date....and a good setting, atmosphere to sit down and getting to know you....sounds like you're not ineterested in her in the first place, then why gave her your e-mail adress....of course she has to give you hers in return as in goodwill for your trusting her by giving hers yours, n also another way of letting you know that she's interested....so anyway, u don't have to take her to a steak dinner, you can even just take her to a fast food dinner lol....and like somebody said, "don't forget the rubber", if you're not a gentleman that is; if you take her to a stake dinner lol, some poor guys think that's the price for paying for a dinner :roll ....hope ur not one of them lol....so go have fun at "do u have McDonald where your living?" , nothing wrong to go to a fast food place :D :lol....but then again everybody are different :lol

noisia
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Joined: Sep 12th, '08, 10:18

Post by noisia » Feb 5th, '09, 10:57

Ahhhhh the girl shouldn't ever say "will you buy me dinner". What happens is you go out for dinner and then you offer to pay for it. Girls these days, pish. Could be a freeloader though lol.

Anyway, I personally ask to go out for a coffee or a drink at a bar to get their number/msn/email. Seems like you've already progressed past this step :p First Date is dinner yes, or lunch. Lunch is better imo, you can go around and have fun before and after lunch whereas you can't do that with dinner. I still would prefer to do the whole coffee and walking around first though.
nankasento wrote:At least she's honoust and up front about it, give me food and I'll communicate with you and you can look at me while I eat, nothing is for free you know. ;D
That works both ways..

Good luck!

makuii
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Post by makuii » Feb 5th, '09, 11:39

@joewong: IMHO- i think she's dropping a hint ^_^, i agree with puppet princess so, she could be hinting she wants more than coffee in this ^_~
but either way- coffee or dinner- it's up to you- go with your instincts...
good luck and have fun!

MeLu
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Post by MeLu » Feb 5th, '09, 11:43

Damn! I wish I could just get guys to buy me dinner! That way I'll get to eat out sometimes without killing my budget!

I think BF would kill me if he ever finds about it, though XD



PS: Nah, I wouldn't be asking stuff like that anyway, even without someone in my life :p If I don't wanna pay for a meal, I eat at home and just get a coffee somewhere ;)

nankasento
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Post by nankasento » Feb 5th, '09, 12:12

noisia wrote:
nankasento wrote:At least she's honoust and up front about it, give me food and I'll communicate with you and you can look at me while I eat, nothing is for free you know. ;D
That works both ways..
I never said it didn't and you are correct, indeed it does works both ways.
It's quite simple actually but usually people just make it complicated, which is fun in it's own way.

theuncontactable
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Post by theuncontactable » Feb 5th, '09, 12:12

I think you have to treat people differently depending on her personality. Seems like she might be a poor student.

Honya Otoko, obviously you like her because you are going through the bullshit part of the mating ritual such as suspicion, jealousy and all the other dark emotions that f6cks up your mind and can turn you to the darkside.

whatever you choose - ganbare.

bomber1122
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Post by bomber1122 » Jan 13th, '10, 12:27

WOW this girl much be vicuius to ask you out liek that, but yea coffee sounds good dont rush it

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