Marriage

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HongKongChick
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Marriage

Postby HongKongChick » Mon Apr 05, 2010 5:21 pm

Ok, so i have a very good friend of mine who's engaged to his girlfriend of 3 years and are gonna be married in September of this year.

he works for the government, makes good money. just bought a brand new house, bought her a brand new car.

their budget for the wedding keeps going up because of all the "things" she wants, she totally dismissed her original idea of the wedding: cheap dress, small wedding. now she wants a dress that cant be bought at a store, ordered it from a magazine. their reception is gonna be 200 guests and up. wedding will be in another state.

he complains about her and the wedding crap every time i see him.

now, i just dont get it. why do men put up with shitty women like that, even though they complain and complain and it's not like she is getting any better. why stay with her?

you all have similar stories?

PS: she doesn't cook, doesn't clean, not into cars like he is. spends money like it grows on trees, into name brands, got fake boobs (he paid for them), she has a history with men (a slut), not pretty by any of my friends' standard. yea.... i dont see her being a great companion. plus she disrespects me.


SORRY, i just needed to vent! :lol

Sciron
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Postby Sciron » Mon Apr 05, 2010 6:00 pm

Quite often this sort of thing happen.
At first the girl appears to be very nice and stuff, you know, the material for marriage, but later on you discover that she is not that good (for example: 港女= typical HK gal).
Just like all the people say love makes people blind, it's just that people will accept more than other people will.

Anyway, if they are together for some time, they might think that it is a waste of time if they break up now. Plus, the girl must have something that the guy likes about her, even if she is not as good as he think she is.

Just ask your friends what he really wants, if he is willing to accept her behaviour in 2 years. Has he really thought about the future?

wsim
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Postby wsim » Mon Apr 05, 2010 6:05 pm

The few people that I know who are married or going to don't seem to have this kind of problem or issue.

It sounds like this guy hasn't exactly thought much about the future or long-term implications moving forward. She doesn't sound like a keeper in my mind either, lol. May be best to talk to him and see how he really feels about this.

Maybe he has accepted her in the end? As well, he may also be unsure or scared of breaking off a long engagement period and years of commitment to this girl.

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Cherek
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Postby Cherek » Mon Apr 05, 2010 9:03 pm

wsim wrote: he may also be unsure or scared of breaking off a long engagement period and years of commitment to this girl.


Think this is more the case.
@HKC, is he the kinda type whole wasnt rly successful with the girls? and how is his level of decisiveness, is he some1 that knows what he wants in life or does he hesitate alot?

Also DONT underestimate the persuasive power of women amongst men! Who said sorcery doesnt exists ought to be shot! :lol

janettd
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Postby janettd » Mon Apr 05, 2010 9:24 pm

Give the guy two papers ask him to write all the good things on one and
all the bad things on the other. When he is finished chock him by just tare the good paper
to bits because in a relationship you dont need to analyse the good things. then tell him to look at the bad list.
Ask him if he really is prepared to live with this woman accepting EVERYTHING on the bad list,
if he can they have a chance but if the answee i no they wont last long.
Bcause you can only change yourself and not another person.
If you get in to a relationship thinking this I like that I can change it's NEVER gonna work

aimlesswanderer
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Postby aimlesswanderer » Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:39 am

It sounds like a divorce (or a very unhappy marriage) waiting to happen, but you never know. Thankfully none of my friends or close relos have done this. Not to say that there haven't been divorces, but nothing as "obvious" and stereotypical as this situation.

If he goes through with it and it ends badly, he has no one to blame but himself.

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:14 pm

first of all. wow. i didnt think this would get this much response!!! so thank you guys!!!

now onto answering some questions you all have.

Sciron wrote:Quite often this sort of thing happen.
At first the girl appears to be very nice and stuff, you know, the material for marriage, but later on you discover that she is not that good (for example: 港女= typical HK gal).
Just like all the people say love makes people blind, it's just that people will accept more than other people will.

Anyway, if they are together for some time, they might think that it is a waste of time if they break up now. Plus, the girl must have something that the guy likes about her, even if she is not as good as he think she is.

Just ask your friends what he really wants, if he is willing to accept her behaviour in 2 years. Has he really thought about the future?


i think you have a point there. i think he might be one of those people that are so used to the relationship and he doesnt want to waste time looking for another so he wont break up with her?! but i have not asked him yet, just my thoughts.

港女!! hahahahahahah :lol i totally know what u mean!!!! i am from hong kong, but i am not 港女, i hope... :P

wsim wrote:The few people that I know who are married or going to don't seem to have this kind of problem or issue.

It sounds like this guy hasn't exactly thought much about the future or long-term implications moving forward. She doesn't sound like a keeper in my mind either, lol. May be best to talk to him and see how he really feels about this.

Maybe he has accepted her in the end? As well, he may also be unsure or scared of breaking off a long engagement period and years of commitment to this girl.


you have a great point there. i will have to really sit down and ask him for real.

Cherek wrote:
wsim wrote: he may also be unsure or scared of breaking off a long engagement period and years of commitment to this girl.


Think this is more the case.
@HKC, is he the kinda type whole wasnt rly successful with the girls? and how is his level of decisiveness, is he some1 that knows what he wants in life or does he hesitate alot?

Also DONT underestimate the persuasive power of women amongst men! Who said sorcery doesnt exists ought to be shot! :lol


to answer ur question, he's had maybe 2-3 real girlfriends, and they were all like her. i think because he is a push over, does whatever the girl wants, but suffers on the inside. so i dont think he knows what he wants for real. even if he does, he is not willing to change anything to get what he wants.

janettd wrote:Give the guy two papers ask him to write all the good things on one and
all the bad things on the other. When he is finished chock him by just tare the good paper
to bits because in a relationship you dont need to analyse the good things. then tell him to look at the bad list.
Ask him if he really is prepared to live with this woman accepting EVERYTHING on the bad list,
if he can they have a chance but if the answee i no they wont last long.
Bcause you can only change yourself and not another person.
If you get in to a relationship thinking this I like that I can change it's NEVER gonna work


i will have to make him do that. ah... he might just think i hate her.... which is true... :D

aimlesswanderer wrote:It sounds like a divorce (or a very unhappy marriage) waiting to happen, but you never know. Thankfully none of my friends or close relos have done this. Not to say that there haven't been divorces, but nothing as "obvious" and stereotypical as this situation.

If he goes through with it and it ends badly, he has no one to blame but himself.


exactly my thoughts too. all of us think that they will either end up divorced or cheat on each other. either way, bad marriage.

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:28 pm

ok, here are some more info on these two.

after they have been dating for 3 years. she thought it is time to get married. but he told us he doesnt want to get married ever if he has a choice.

then when he got a job down here (he used to live in another state), he came to stay at my house for about 6 weeks till he bought his new house. during that time, he would complain and complain about her or the wedding stuff. and apparently she "told" him they should get married. and she "told" him that he would buy a ring for her when he gets his first paycheck from his new job. she has the ring picked out for him to buy. so one day after work, he said "oh yea... i am supposed to get her a ring today.... " to me that doesnt even sound romantic at all for a proposal. basically no proposal at all, he just simply gave her the ring she already picked out.

then he said originally they wanted to get married in Florida with their families and that's all, but now, it turned into a 200+ guests reception, and Florida too. she said she shouldnt wear a white wedding dress since she is not innocent, and she said she didnt really want to wear an expensive dress that is only worn once. but now, it turned into a "i want an unique dress that cannot be bought at a bridal store"

to me, it's freaking stupid, u are not even having a wedding wedding. is there a point to get a 5000 dollar dress and only to have ur family there to see it? dumb.

he is into cars like i am and alot of our friends. but she isnt. so when he blew his motor two years ago, he didnt work on it because she didnt allow him. since they had to buy a house and a brand new car for her, he didnt have the funds to do his project. and now after two years, he finally fixed it. and he blew it again. i dont know how long it will be before it's fixed again.

ok, another issue. she is very typical american. white, blonde highlights, big boobs, wears UGG boots, carries Coach bags...etc. plus cant cook, doesnt like cleaning. loves shopping.... and doesnt eat anything other than regular american food. she would sit at the sushi place with us, and not eat. or korean or whatever. she comes to my house, but wont take off her freaking shoes, her reason being "i have already walked inside the house, now there is not point to take them off" and she complains about my house being cold, i like to save money on electricity, so i keep my house chilly in the winter and warn in the summer. and i dry my clothes on the clothes lines in the back yard, and she said "oh no, i cant, i am too lazy for that" when i have people over for dinner, she will not eat. she will pick up fast food on the way here. yea....

i just really dont freaking get it..... honestly i dont like her at all. she said i hate america once when we were discussing some current events and before i could even freaking finish what i was trying to say, she said "oh you just hate america" she is loud, attention whore, and dumb..... ARGH!!!!!!

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:33 pm

oh, maybe she is just amazing in bed. that's all i could think of. :D :D :D

TheVinster
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Postby TheVinster » Tue Apr 06, 2010 5:44 pm

Ew, a typical American girl. She'd have to be Asian for me to accept that kind of treatment.

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 06, 2010 6:52 pm

TheVinster wrote:Ew, a typical American girl. She'd have to be Asian for me to accept that kind of treatment.


so if she is Asian and acts exactly like this girl, u would still put up with her because she is Asian?

hell if i were a guy, i would NEVER put up with a girl like that, no matter if she is a super model or a princess.

i just think that it cannot be a double standard. if a girl expects the guy to be a certain way, she must provide some traits the guy wants in her. i guess that's just how i see it.

TheVinster
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Postby TheVinster » Tue Apr 06, 2010 7:24 pm

HongKongChick wrote:
TheVinster wrote:Ew, a typical American girl. She'd have to be Asian for me to accept that kind of treatment.


so if she is Asian and acts exactly like this girl, u would still put up with her because she is Asian?

hell if i were a guy, i would NEVER put up with a girl like that, no matter if she is a super model or a princess.

i just think that it cannot be a double standard. if a girl expects the guy to be a certain way, she must provide some traits the guy wants in her. i guess that's just how i see it.


Lol no, I wouldn't put up with it. I can't stand girls like that. This girl does sound undesirable so maybe you could just slap some sense into your friend.

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 06, 2010 7:35 pm

i asked him why he always goes out with girls that dont like other foods, and he said "well she is trying, takes her a while to get used to new things" well jeeze, if it takes a girl 3 years to try eating sushi rolls. how long does it take for her to try to be a good woman?

aimlesswanderer
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Postby aimlesswanderer » Fri Apr 09, 2010 3:21 pm

It seems like he got pushed/bullied into the whole thing. He certainly doesn't appear to be enthusiastic at all, and that is a baaaaad sign. I hope he signs a tight prenup, as she sounds like she is really high maintenance and vapid.

But, really, apart from waging a drama-like 'campaign' with your other like minded friends, you can't do much if he lets himself get pushed along. Maybe you should get him to go on a week trip to the middle of nowhere (no phones) and see if he misses her at all. Or take a leaf of out a drama and tell him "OMG she got hit by a car and is in hospital!!" and see how he reacts.

If he just goes along with it however, you'll just have to grit your teeth and try and avoid her as much as possible.

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Postby HongKongChick » Fri Apr 09, 2010 5:25 pm

aimlesswanderer wrote:It seems like he got pushed/bullied into the whole thing. He certainly doesn't appear to be enthusiastic at all, and that is a baaaaad sign. I hope he signs a tight prenup, as she sounds like she is really high maintenance and vapid.

But, really, apart from waging a drama-like 'campaign' with your other like minded friends, you can't do much if he lets himself get pushed along. Maybe you should get him to go on a week trip to the middle of nowhere (no phones) and see if he misses her at all. Or take a leaf of out a drama and tell him "OMG she got hit by a car and is in hospital!!" and see how he reacts.

If he just goes along with it however, you'll just have to grit your teeth and try and avoid her as much as possible.


hahah... u are soooooo reading my mind.

yes i feel that he is being pushed into this. his mom wanted them to get married and his mom like his gf. funny thing about that is his mom doesnt like alot of people, she is not fond of me either. maybe coz i am not white. but honestly his mom is nuts. hahah

he used to be a fun outgoing guy, ever since he's been with her, he has become a couch potato. going to sleep early and all, never hangs out with friends past 11pm. a party pooper really. and when he brings her out, no one gets to talk coz she talks alot and loud.

it's hard to hang out with him alone coz she is always there with him wherever he goes. and if he hangs out with us alone, she would call 20 times.

every time we hang out without her, he seems to enjoy it alot coz she isnt looking over his shoulders. but as soon as she calls him, he is like "omg, there;s the call of death"

i do try to avoid her as much as possible. whenever i know she'd be there, i call backup. so i dont have to be the only girl.

she would come to my house and sits there and surfs the internet while the rest of us are eating and cleaning up after. she would say "oh you shouldve told me u were cleaning up, i wouldve helped" i am thinking, really? so all of us, getting up, picking up the plates and taking them to the kitchen isnt a good indication? or she would come over when we have dinner parties, and she said she is on a diet. so she wont eat my food, but she brought Ice cream... and eats a big ass bowl. diet?

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Fantastical
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Postby Fantastical » Sat Apr 10, 2010 8:21 am

hhhmmmm....I know I am missing a bunch of tells and stuff like a blind man at a poker game.
For him ...He sounds like an idealist.
and optimist.
seeing the good in everyone and not wanting to give up on a particular person I.E. Prince Charming Syndrome.
Like a drama where the person sees the lone rebel and sees the good in them where everyone else sees her as a evil **** but he sees the god in her but he tries to prove to the world that she is really a good person especially to that girl.
If that is the case , bad mouthing her in anyway will only reinforce that mission.
Not only to show people that she is really a good person
but to also prove that he is not like other guys that may have dumped her or given up on her.
He doesn't want to be that guy.
you know. the classic "my last boyfriend was an **** *sniff* and he lied when he said he would love me forever" shtick.

She more than likely already senses that she isn't liked if not downright loathed. If so then why would she want to hang ot with you guys? Think about it. If SHE can think of something evil and vengeful then she can imagine that you would do worse to get rid of her and break her and him up. If I was her I wouldn't eat your cooking either. Eating an almond cookie without any almonds in them is now what she wants to do (P.S. If you don't get the poison reference you really need to study up on your poisons)

As far as that buying all that crap wedding dress bullshit It's got to be an outside source.
A get a nice dress there. Invite your auntie there, and your aunt Bernice crap with wedding fever and it can happen to anybody. It happened to my ex-fiance.

If he isn't going to give her up and he is totally committed (which I do admire because that is a true testament of unconditional love. a bit dangerous but still unconditional nonetheless.) Suggest that he whisk her away on a surprise eloping weekend.

If you can't make him stop then the best you can do is guide him to a quick and painless death with as little damage to his wallet and hopefully his soul.

I am not saying be happy for the dude. Just tell him you him to treat himself as good as he treats her becasue he is an awesome guy and deserves it.

aimlesswanderer
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Postby aimlesswanderer » Sat Apr 10, 2010 1:50 pm

Err, ok, but from my POV, if you're getting married you should be enthusiastic about it, otherwise what is the point? He seems ambivalent and unenthusiastic at best, and I don't know about anyone else, but that screams "this wedding is a bad idea". I get how he may not want to make her unhappy, but getting shoved along into a marriage you aren't excited about seems like a very bad idea. If they get divorced years down the track, will that hurt her less, or is it better to not get her hopes up and do it now?

It doesn't seem like "unconditional love", it sounds like he is doing whatever she wants even though he has reservations. It's just letting her decided everything and not being bothered/brave enough to say no. Is that a healthy relationship? I think not.

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PocketKiriyama
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Postby PocketKiriyama » Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:32 pm

LOL I love icecream and can eat a bowl too!

I have these kind of similar problems with some of my friends' girlfriends. Seriously what is up with that? It's like when they are around us they act like they're the one running the show. I'm sorry but there should be some equilibrium in a relationship. Funny thing is my close friend have a girlfriend and they are very understanding of each other and been dating for a few years but.....I sense that they are more likely to break up rather than the other problematic couples. Why is that?

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Fantastical
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Postby Fantastical » Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:52 pm

PocketKiriyama wrote:LOL I love icecream and can eat a bowl too!

I have these kind of similar problems with some of my friends' girlfriends. Seriously what is up with that? It's like when they are around us they act like they're the one running the show. I'm sorry but there should be some equilibrium in a relationship. Funny thing is my close friend have a girlfriend and they are very understanding of each other and been dating for a few years but.....I sense that they are more likely to break up rather than the other problematic couples. Why is that?


I know exactly what you mean.
The one couple that is sweet and works great together breaks up but the arguing bickering couples sticks it through.
It's because they argue. and they handle the situation right then and there and not let it fester and boil bundled up in civility and manners. They air out their laundry righ then and there.

Grandma always said never go to sleep angry.

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PocketKiriyama
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Postby PocketKiriyama » Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:56 pm

Actually they usually doesn't fight and barely get angry at each other. It's just that my friend doesn't seem serious about the relationship. He is sweet to her though but...it's like he doesn't think she's the one.

HongKongChick
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Postby HongKongChick » Sat Apr 10, 2010 10:04 pm

maybe giving him the benefit of the doubt that he sees the good in her and doesnt want to give up. but when is enough? like aimlesswanderer said, isnt it better to end it now than a few more years down the road where he is absolutely miserable?

like i said before, he has dated girls like her and he ended it himself, so what's different this time? perhaps this one isnt as fat as the other ones. hahaha....

u know? to me, if my friends dont like my boyfriend, there is something wrong with him. it's one thing if just one person doesnt like her, but it's not the case. my neighbors dont like her, my friends dont like her... my neighbors' friend doesnt like her... i mean honestly at best, people tolerate her. and my friend knows his gf isnt liked.

lots of people like me, and i like lots of people, but she is basically the only one who i just cannot stand. there must be something real wrong about her. :D

i just dont know where to start talking to him. i mean i dont wanna raise hell between me and him, but i sure dont like seeing him complain all the time

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PocketKiriyama
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Postby PocketKiriyama » Sat Apr 10, 2010 10:31 pm

Usually at times like this you either put up with it and let him bare his own consequences or he needs to man up and discuss it with her. I believe a good lasting marriage can only come from a mutual understand between a couple so if got problems he needs to discuss it with her or things are going to go downhill after they really start to live together and share rents and all them good stuff.

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Re: Marriage

Postby techie » Sat Apr 10, 2010 11:17 pm

HongKongChick wrote:dismissed her original idea of the wedding: cheap dress, small wedding. now she wants a dress that cant be bought at a store, ordered it from a magazine. l


DUmb as can be...
I worked with one of the largest US bridal chains for many years and I know from having done a lot of backkend data work that most dresses you think cannot be bought, are infact made in China for 1/20 the price tag you see in the store.

You could only guess how many $300-$700 dresses actually cost little more than $25-$45 to import.

Not to mention the fancy smancy Maggie Wong's and all those for $3,000 made by some kid in Tibet.

She's not the dumb one by the way... Kick your friend in the head before she does it :!
:blink $zipCode = strtoupper($zipCode); // it is not the case of being sensitive... XD

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Re: Marriage

Postby HongKongChick » Sun Apr 11, 2010 12:42 am

techie wrote:
HongKongChick wrote:dismissed her original idea of the wedding: cheap dress, small wedding. now she wants a dress that cant be bought at a store, ordered it from a magazine. l


DUmb as can be...
I worked with one of the largest US bridal chains for many years and I know from having done a lot of backkend data work that most dresses you think cannot be bought, are infact made in China for 1/20 the price tag you see in the store.

You could only guess how many $300-$700 dresses actually cost little more than $25-$45 to import.

Not to mention the fancy smancy Maggie Wong's and all those for $3,000 made by some kid in Tibet.

She's not the dumb one by the way... Kick your friend in the head before she does it :!


that's true. :-) except i already know how much the dress is, and it's not under 1000 bucks. :roll

but i might have to kick him in the head for real. :mrgreen:

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Postby HongKongChick » Sun Apr 11, 2010 12:47 am

PocketKiriyama wrote:Usually at times like this you either put up with it and let him bare his own consequences or he needs to man up and discuss it with her. I believe a good lasting marriage can only come from a mutual understand between a couple so if got problems he needs to discuss it with her or things are going to go downhill after they really start to live together and share rents and all them good stuff.


yea u r right. in the perfect world, he wouldve already dumped her. but it's not perfect. so he is stuck in this rut and complains alot. that's what gets me. they talked and all, but she won every time. hahaha

they are already living together. have been since 2 years ago. and she is not contributing to the mortgage, he is. and u see? she doesnt cook, so there is really nothing she needs to do chores wise.

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Re: Marriage

Postby Fantastical » Sun Apr 11, 2010 12:52 am

HongKongChick wrote:
but i might have to kick him in the head for real. :mrgreen:


If you were a real friend you'd just poison the **** and get it over with.

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PocketKiriyama
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Postby PocketKiriyama » Sun Apr 11, 2010 2:19 pm

HongKongChick wrote:
PocketKiriyama wrote:Usually at times like this you either put up with it and let him bare his own consequences or he needs to man up and discuss it with her. I believe a good lasting marriage can only come from a mutual understand between a couple so if got problems he needs to discuss it with her or things are going to go downhill after they really start to live together and share rents and all them good stuff.


yea u r right. in the perfect world, he wouldve already dumped her. but it's not perfect. so he is stuck in this rut and complains alot. that's what gets me. they talked and all, but she won every time. hahaha

they are already living together. have been since 2 years ago. and she is not contributing to the mortgage, he is. and u see? she doesnt cook, so there is really nothing she needs to do chores wise.


Ah a losing battle...

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Postby choppol » Fri Apr 23, 2010 1:19 am

If my wife does that (I'm married for 6 yrs now) I would have told her off and leave her. But my wife helps me out alot.

A relationship goes both ways. If your friend's gf does that then eventually he will leave her.

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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 27, 2010 10:39 pm

choppol wrote:If my wife does that (I'm married for 6 yrs now) I would have told her off and leave her. But my wife helps me out alot.

A relationship goes both ways. If your friend's gf does that then eventually he will leave her.


that's what i am waiting for. i just dont know when he will actually do it.

the other day, he came over to work on his engine (his engine is in my garage) and i had cooked, so i asked if he wanted some, he said "do you even have to ask?" and i felt so bad for him, his gf doesnt even cook for him. it takes an act of congress for her to cook anything.

and the yesterday, he was over again, and i asked if he wanted something to eat (i cooked fried rice) and he said he has eaten, i asked what he had and where, he said he made steaks and potatoes and veggies... i mean come the f**k on man, does she ever do anything nice for him?

she must be great in bed! AHAHAHHA :lol

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Postby HongKongChick » Tue Apr 27, 2010 10:44 pm

it truly pisses me off when i see all these women that dont have any quality that a wife in the 50's or 60's had, but all these men fell head over heels for them. wtf?

do people dont have standards these days? wat? as long as she has a vagina, then men will marry them?

for me, my husband has to be a handy man around the house, he cannot NOT do anything in the house. at least mows or fixes stuff. but then again, maybe that's asking too much for the boys these days, they are all freaking spoiled rotten mamma's boy. hahahaha

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PocketKiriyama
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Location: Some where in Illinois, USA

Postby PocketKiriyama » Wed Apr 28, 2010 1:41 am

Look's like someone's back in action. If I was to marry I would have to ask my mom to teach me how to cook some of my favorite dishes as I only know how to cook Italian.

LaLaLaDRAMA
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Location: sunnytown CALI

Postby LaLaLaDRAMA » Wed Apr 28, 2010 2:16 am

From what I'm reading, it sounds like maybe you have feelings for him? Sorry if I'm wrong.

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PocketKiriyama
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Location: Some where in Illinois, USA

Postby PocketKiriyama » Wed Apr 28, 2010 2:30 am

LaLaLaDRAMA wrote:From what I'm reading, it sounds like maybe you have feelings for him? Sorry if I'm wrong.


Or maybe she's just annoyed. I was the same with one of my friend's boyfriend at one point but I'm glad those two finally worked it out.

HongKongChick
Posts: 227
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Location: Hong Kong

Postby HongKongChick » Wed Apr 28, 2010 8:02 pm

no, i really dont have feelings for him. he is just a great guy and friend. he will do anything for me and i will do the same. so no, i dont like him like that.

yes, i am annoyed. i would be ok if i didnt have to see her ass all the time. but she is ALWAYS with him whenever he comes over....so..ya....

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ojouprincess
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Location: Tokyo, Japan

Postby ojouprincess » Fri Aug 20, 2010 1:25 am

My boyfriend and I are "unofficially" engaged, but I'm having second thoughts about it. I feel that he's not the right guy for me. I know that it's unfair for him, but I can't help myself. Hopefully, I'll be able to sort my feelings out soon.
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PocketKiriyama
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Postby PocketKiriyama » Fri Aug 20, 2010 1:42 am

ojouprincess wrote:My boyfriend and I are "unofficially" engaged, but I'm having second thoughts about it. I feel that he's not the right guy for me. I know that it's unfair for him, but I can't help myself. Hopefully, I'll be able to sort my feelings out soon.


Life is never fair. It would be even worst to marry without being 100 percent sure about your feelings.

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JiveTalkinRobot
Posts: 122
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Location: Orange County, California

Postby JiveTalkinRobot » Wed Sep 22, 2010 5:08 am

HongKongChick wrote:
TheVinster wrote:Ew, a typical American girl. She'd have to be Asian for me to accept that kind of treatment.


so if she is Asian and acts exactly like this girl, u would still put up with her because she is Asian?

hell if i were a guy, i would NEVER put up with a girl like that, no matter if she is a super model or a princess.

i just think that it cannot be a double standard. if a girl expects the guy to be a certain way, she must provide some traits the guy wants in her. i guess that's just how i see it.


If it was Shin Min Ah...I would put up with it. Anyone else...no...but Shin Min Ah...that is a different story.

brock9233
Posts: 17
Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2010 7:01 am

Postby brock9233 » Sun Oct 03, 2010 12:45 pm

I think they have put in a big gap after their engagement.

shintee
Posts: 54
Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2007 2:07 am
Location: PJ Selangor MALAYSIA

Postby shintee » Wed Jan 19, 2011 8:24 am

from all that HongKongchick has said, man, honestly, I don't get guys at all. They are like from another freaking species. ah whatever! I give up

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salaryman
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Postby salaryman » Tue Jan 25, 2011 2:15 am

shintee wrote:from all that HongKongchick has said, man, honestly, I don't get guys at all. They are like from another freaking species. ah whatever! I give up


heh. are you trying to figure out all guys at once? its hard enough to figure out one person.

gitarooqueen
Posts: 8
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Postby gitarooqueen » Sun Apr 24, 2011 9:56 pm

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Last edited by gitarooqueen on Thu May 10, 2018 5:13 am, edited 1 time in total.

Shampkin
Posts: 2
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Location: IRAN

Postby Shampkin » Wed Jun 01, 2011 9:07 pm

YYEEEESSSH!

Man, that chick sounds like a walking nightmare! See, I always thought girls like these are the reason why good girls can't find a good boy for themselves, since them bitches go out an ruin all the good guys!!! I'm Asian myself and I see a lot of this happening every in the world (since I grew up in 2 different countries - Malaysia & Australia)....

I just feel bad for your friend and I sincerely hope he's not gonna make a big mistake my marrying her.... I can't believe he paid for her boobs, she probably talked her way into it!!!

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MoonRaven
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Postby MoonRaven » Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:43 am

He should learn when to say no.
Like 'no we are not having 200 guests'
And 'I don't want to be married out of town. He has to learn to put his foot down. If he doesn't, she think she can get away with everything.
My wedding will have 30 guests, in a chapel, with dinner at a Chinese buffet. I don't need more cause I have all I want by having HIM. He makes the day worth while.
Not the dress or ring or whatever. I hope your friend maybe had a talk with her.


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