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Love on the internet


 
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weekleytOffline
Joined: 11 May 2008
Total posts: 4
Location: Australia
Gender: Male
PostPosted: Sun May 11, 2008 1:17 pm    Post subject: Love on the internet   Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

Hey everyone.
I'm new here to the site.

I noticed this relationships forum and thought I'd ask what people's opinions about meeting people on the internet.

I live in Australia and a few months ago met a Japanese girl over the internet. We haven't met in person yet, but we both really like each other. I've spoken to a few friends about it and they think its becoming more normal these days.

What do people here think about it?


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Néa VanilleOffline
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Joined: 26 Mar 2005
Total posts: 56
Location: Seoul, South Korea (whooooza!)
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PostPosted: Sun May 11, 2008 1:39 pm    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

I generally think that finding love on the internet is a good method, although as with all methods of courtship it isn't without big flaws.

Good things about love on the internet: the lack of visuals to distract you really allows you to listen to what the person has to SAY. Getting hundreds of hours of conversation under your belt is essential before you can seriously fall in love with anyone, and you can very easily get these on the internet. A lot of people make the mistake of falling into a relationship too hastily, tending to burn the relationship out quickly. With the distance constraint in internet dating, you are forced to take it slower, which results in a better success rate.

The big drawback is, of course, the distance. I'd say that unless you or her are planning on permanently moving to the other person's country in the foreseeable future, it's probably not worth doing it.

I met my bf on the internet, too. He's Korean and we met while I was back home and preparing to move to Korea, so we met after about 4 months of chatting and started dating 2 days after meeting because we already knew each other so well, there was little hesitation (and it turned out to be justified). However, if I hadn't already been planning on moving to Korea, I can't see how it would have worked out long-term.

Best of luck.
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weekleytOffline
Joined: 11 May 2008
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Location: Australia
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PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2008 2:57 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

Hey, thanks for your opinion.

I think I agree with you.
I talk with her every morning before work and at night before going to bed. I have gotten to know her really well.
I think thats why I started to like her. We know more about each other than I have with previous girlfriend I had.

Yeah, I'm planning on going to Japan in December. Still quite a while to go.
But we are both really looking forward to meeting. If things go well, then we plan to get more serious.
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slowmoeOffline
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Joined: 29 Apr 2008
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Location: westcoast
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PostPosted: Mon May 12, 2008 4:33 pm    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

@weekleyt....congrats man....chatting hooking up with girls on the internet is easy imo....save time and money going to places finding girls....sometimes girls are more open to talk about things online than in person i think....but yea theres always pros and cons meeting people online....i experienced both....goodluck with your girl...peace.....
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zippyfluOffline
Joined: 06 Oct 2005
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Location: cherry hill, nj
Age: 24
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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 9:04 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

good for u, hope everything stays good... Long distance is hard.. just make sure she isnt butt!!(no im not being shallow im being very very serious) some ppl lie about small stuff.. like how old they are, where they were last nite.. or how they look.

i personally cant do long distance cuz i need the physical-ality.. not just sex.. the touchin and the holding.. but thats just me.. have fun wit urs
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docipainOffline
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Joined: 10 Dec 2005
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Location: An orange little house in Osaka
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PostPosted: Wed May 14, 2008 9:18 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

oh yes...this topic...it has always pros and cons....in my opinion..well...I had such a relationship too years ago...though it was more like that he fel for me nd we met only two times in that time period until I broke up because on the net I never had the feeling of loving him. Those two times were lovely though.

Hmm right now there is a similar case but this time it's different...the distance is a little bit bigger but not that much (Berlin <------> Austria) but this time we both are seriously in love and will spend some time together in summer. I have already seen this person two times though but in that time it was only based on friendship. THat's why I am a little afraid that it turns out different when we meet again....but well yeah...finding the love on the internet is definitely possible although you never can be sure if the person is the same in reality. I mean the thoughts the person has are the same but in which way he/she conveys it....you never know if it's the same you are in love with....
another con is the desire...the desire of being with this person..it's kind of painful because you know it is not possible to say "Oh I am right there in 2 hours" or whatever..V-v
And I am still unsure if it has future....unless one of them is moving closer.

but whatever...there is always a chance...so I also wish much luck Smile

_________________

Join Ryo Watch! Uchi is stalking there as well! ;D
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weekleytOffline
Joined: 11 May 2008
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Location: Australia
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PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2008 11:17 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

Hey.

Thanks for your opnion's everyone.
I think i kind agree with everyone here.

@slowme
yeah, your right about them being more open on the internet. Even wher I didn't know her well she would often ask for my advice and talk to me about rather personal things. But I guess that also shows that she trust's me.

@zippyflu
i agree with you too. i know my girl isnt lieing about her age or what she looks like, but sometimes i have my concerns about what she does sometimes. I want to trust her but from some things she has told me about what has happened in the past, i sometimes find it difficult.

@docipain
Yeah. you said many things which are true for my situation. We know that we both like each other and how we communicate when talking on email or chat, but we are both afraid about what will happen when we are able to meet,

Also, it is definantly painful about being so far apart. Things at home and school havent been going well for me lately so im often feeling kinda depressed and maybe a bit lonely. So when i talk with her, we both say how we wish we could just go to each others house or something, but we know its not possible.

Long distance relationships are definalty hard work...but i really like this girl so im hoping that we can make it last until i am able to go to her.

thanks again for all your opinions and support.
I also wish you luck to everyone who is in the same sort of situation
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oovanillaooOffline
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Joined: 19 May 2008
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Location: Canada
Age: 20
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PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2008 1:08 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

Well... I wouldn't use the internet as a method to find your lover on the net, but coincidentally I found mine over the net.

I think it's safe you really found a nice person, but if you're really unlucky, that person may be very dangerous and have bad intentions to you (you know...)

The person I met one was over a game, and we've been together for more than 2 years. During these years it was TOUGH I tell you... You can't hug your lover when you feel sad/happy, you can't see the person whenever you want, when you're having a fight you can't talk things out in person... But as long your love is strong things DO work =)
In my case, we travel back and forth and I'm going to marry him soon! I'm immigrating to his country and I hope we can work things out after marriage ^^

Good luck to you!!! Wub Love is powerful~
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zhinsaraOffline
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Joined: 19 May 2008
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Location: Ipoh/KL
Age: 19
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PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2008 4:09 am    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

haha. i think love over the net is cute. seriously Smile i found my first love through the net, then we meet up in church and it sparks Big Smile but we did not last long cause he was unfaithful. it lasted us for 3 years. still, i strongly encourage you to go for it! there is nothing to lose right? and if you two are really together, then faster get married Big SmileBig SmileBig Smile
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weekleytOffline
Joined: 11 May 2008
Total posts: 4
Location: Australia
Gender: Male
PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2008 12:04 pm    Post subject:    Post Rating: 0 Reply with quote

@oovanillaoo

Yeah. It is important to know that they have good intention and not some one who plans on doing something dangerous.
I wish you good luck with you guy! I hope you have a happy marriage


@zhinsara

Hehe, you think it's cute? I haven't heard someone call it cute before. lol
I'm sorry it didn't work out for you.
Yeah, I'm moving to her town in December and hopefully if it goes well we will live together.
Haha, actually, even though we have never met, sometimes we do talk about marriage hehe
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